Ramblings of a Midnight Mind

So I don't sleep.

I swear I must have insomia or something.

I actually did sleep today. I fell asleep around 8am after I got home from work and ate. I woke up when my parents came home from DC and saw that I was asleep, and then I woke up at 12am and haven't been back to bed since.

It would be one thing if when this happened I did something productive like clean my room, or write my book. Yet at this hour I can't seem to string two thoughts together in a really meaningful way. A blog I don't really need to have epic thoughts on (I am however impressed with the title I came up with for this Blog)

So what do I do at this time of night?

I eat hahaha
I watch movies
I facebook stalk
I blog...apparently
I pray that someone will text me so I won't be so bored
I hope I can fall asleep

So here I am rambling to cyber space, and all the readers that I don't have.

I wanted to get up tomorrow morning and spend some quality time in my garage dancing. I miss dancing, all kinds of dance. So if I can drag by insomniac ass out of bed I will be spending a decent amount of time dancing before I go to work.

Then hopefully tomorrow after work I will be spending time with my sister. I haven't seen her in so long. She has been so busy with school and the boys. I can't blame her, she is a much better student than I am I wish I had half her motivation. I just want to finish my AA and then see if I want to continue school. I have so much to think about and at past 3am all my thoughts just won't stop hitting me.

God I started this post over a half an hour ago, and I am really just rambling, not saying anything at all.

So I think I am going to stop. I might post again later...maybe when I can string a thought together without rambling.

For now I leave and try to sleep...or something.

Home Again

It amazes me how I can fall off the face of the planet and still come back to my blog. This Blog is like my own personal life cockroach...not sure I like the idea of a life cockroach or if that even makes sense. Yet somehow this blog feels like home, I can wander away from it and yet it's always there still waiting for me. It's amazing that a website that I basically use to bitch on can make me feel like that and my own home, with my parents can't. I guess this is a form a writing, and writing to me no matter what form it's in, is home. It has gotten to a point where I don't know what would thrill me more, being a working actor or a published author. I really want both, and its hard to say which one I want more. I guess I just assume that one day I will get published, which is kind of a stupid assumption to make, but somehow that feels more real then acting I guess. My friends have recently been making me feel guilty because I know what I want, and even if I can't get what I want, I have a back up plan. If I can't act, or write, then I will teach because that odl quote about doing teachers is just too good to ignore hahahaha. I have also been trying to figure out who my real friends are. I find that the people who I work with in the theater are better friends to me then those people I always considered my 'real' friends. The theater people I hang out with are not fake, or don't put on an act like most people think. They accept that I am who I am, good bad and ugly. I am finally finding my home, one brick at a time.